How (actually) Does A Moment Last Forever?
Our memory is probably the most advanced data storage unit in existence. All our experiences are in there - I mean ALL. (NOTE: FWIW, accessing it though is different per person, but something for a different journal entry lol). In my opinion, what makes our brain memory “advanced” is the emotions that you experience when you do “remember”.
With the advent of photography (and I’m talking about “camera obscura” [yeah, that far back]), capturing the moment has seen to have gotten better, and so much easier. But in recent times, I’ve experienced that having the memory in the form of the physical realism of a photo (or video) heightens the emotional side of what you wanted to remember… and in my case, made it worse.
This last summer, I had a falling out with someone I cared deeply about. It was a brief, but tough period in my life where feelings of melancholy and grief would set in (although I wouldn’t characterize it as such - I new exactly who and what caused these feelings). So you’d think that after a point - all of the “memories” would ebb and get replaced with more recent, salient information (basically dislodging that memory with what the latest show is on Netflix).
Nope.
Most moments now are available to scroll through multimedia on your mobile device. Shit. So basically by looking at those images you can “re-live” the memory of good moments - AND bad. Seeing photos and videos of my “lost one” made it even harder to focus. Concentrate. Imagine working hard to a place of serenity - and then succumbing to the inevitable entropy. You’re probably asking, “Why don’t you just purge all the photos and videos?” Easy.
Uh-uh.
In removing the physical traces of that memory (and consequently the emotions attached), you eliminate the good parts of the experience as well. I wasn’t strong enough to do that. Every day I had to “see” the memories and train my thoughts to only focus on the positive. Every day I had to apply rationale as silly putty for a broken heart. As days became months it got easier (“easier” is relative, by my measure - it’s how many times you can have a sour face in a day). Still a work in progress.
Total Solar Eclipse, 2024 (Pulaski, NY)
So what is my recommendation for actually having a moment last forever?
It’s working at it. It’s effort. It’s love. It’s realizing that that moment was good AND bad - and “choosing” to think kindly. For as long as your brain cells are accessible, your subscription to a large cloud-based photo album - and your heart beats.